Days 3&4

So .... plyo kicked my butt. There are muscles in there woken up that are not happy at the awakening. I'm moving pretty darn funny

That and I had an impromptu schedule change that negated any chance to do a work out so yesterday was a definite rest day.

Today, though, I woke up early and finally acted on my need to run. I'd been having anxiety about running which always happens when its been too long since my last one. I get anxiety because I haven't experienced the calming effects of a run and I get anxiety about that first run after a hiatus being difficult as it always is. But I got up and despite my screaming leg muscles got out the door for 2 miles. I could not push for 3 and you know what, I'm ok with that.

On tap today was Yoga X. 90 minutes of yoga. Yikes.

Expectations: super aggressive, fast paced vinyasas, aggressive hard to reach poses

Realty: Plenty of chattarangas & downward dog, but at a steady enough pace that I kept up and only fell out a few times. I did 70 of the 90 minutes due to time crunch. I can tell that even the tiny 2x a week sessions I'm doing currently have had a positive affect on my flexibility because this wasn't as bad as I have experienced in yoga classes in the past. I like this DVD and I think I'll look forward to yoga day! :)

My legs after yoga are feeling much better! So glad I made the effort to do this one!

day 2: plyometrics

Woke up this morning only a bit sore. I can definitely tell muscles were worked yesterday. Nothing unmanageable though. Running has taught me to listen to my body and I would like to think I'm quite in tune enough not to push too far. Unfortunately that means I don't push hard enough sometimes. I think I pushed it just right.

Usually, this is where I'd go, "oh I'm sore. Guess its a rest day." Not this time. Todays DVD: Plyometrics.

Jump work outs, cardio. The runner in me knows these are the exercises I need to do to get my legs in better condition.

Expectations: hard, jumping & squats

Realty: Squats, squats & more squats...and some lunges.

Thoughts: I could keep up for the most part but definitely had to modify some of the exercises. I liked this one. We'll see how much my legs like me tomorrow....

getting out of my comfort zone

I run. That's my exercise of choice. I like it. I do it as often as I can. Its about endurance. I'm stubborn enough to push through a tough long run. The results are easy to see week to week as my endurance improves.

Every time I set out to train for a distance race, I mean to incorporate more strength training. I hate strength training, mostly because I know I'm weak. Unlike running where I continually prove to myself how strong I am, strength training just shows me how weak I truly am. It brings out every negative voice in the back of my head. That negative voice mocks my attempts and often derails me after 1 or 2 sessions. Deep down I know that if I did more of it like I did with running, I'd improve and eventually get to the feelings I have about running only for strength training. I also acknowledge that a marathon is becoming a bit of a goal for me and I can not do that without getting stronger.

So today a journey/experiment starts: p90x.

My first workout: Chest & Back; Ab Ripper X

Expectations: push ups & pull ups, none of which I can really do

What it delivered: push ups & Pull ups, none of which I can really do.

Well I lie a bit on that, I can do some push ups,... just not as many or as many variations in the video. Pull ups... you know someday I'd love to be able to do 1. Until then it'll be the resistance bands for me!

Ab Ripper X: I was toast after like 2 minutes. The rest I half assed, thus only cheating myself. Maybe by the end of this journey I can make it through it.

So yes, a lot of work to do, progress to hopefully be made. This program works for those who stick with it, may I find my way through.

Coming up tomorrow: plyometrics

Also in less than 2 weeks I do the running portion of a triathalon... I should probably get out for some runs before then. May the sleep gods be on my side so I can get back on track working out.

Sleep: feast or famine

Transitioning to my new schedule has it benefits: seeing my husband everyday, less traffic, the fun 3rd shifters I get to work with but what I'm struggling with is sleep.

Its feast or famine. One or two nights of 10 hours... then a night of no sleep or less than 4 hrs. In other words I'm completely oversleeping or completely sleep deprived with no consistent rest.

I'm also struggling to work out. It means I need to stay up til light to head out for my run thus encouraging the insomnia, but the insomnia and hypersomnia cycles are leading to lethargy/laziness. In the next few days I will outline my P90X training plan so I can start that on Monday.

Another drawback:  I'm hungry ALL the freaking time because my body doesn't know when to eat so it wants to eat all the time.

I'm only on week 2 of this new schedule so i hope in the next two weeks to get my body calibrated to this lifestyle and also work on regaining my life.

Stay tuned....

When being a workaholic backfires

I had two simultaneous trains of thought going this week:

I enjoy working and many times its like paid socialization for me. I enjoy serving a purpose and also enjoy pushing myself. (Its why running is a good sport for me)  I like money too. After 3 years of not having any, its nice to not have to mind every penny.

The other realization though is that when someone who hasn't talked to me in months asks what I've been up to the last few months, the only answer i have is work and running. That makes me kind of sad. What have I done that's been fun in the past 6 months? While I have much to be grateful for in my life I'm starting to worry that I'm driving myself to breakdown.

So this girl needs to start finding a life again. Reintigrate myself socially. Do fun things. Have experiences. I made the choice to live in a big area yet I rarely leave my little bubble. Why was it so important for me to get out of the past places I lived for the glamour of the metro if I don't do anything but sit and watch TV, shop, work & run?

And in this life long journey to what I want to be when I grow up, I need to find myself.

Shift work

Recently my schedule changed. Starting this week I'm flipping to a mostly 3rd shift existence. Its actually a 2nd/3rd position meaning I straddle both shifts. It'll be an adjustment for sure. I'm no stranger to working late nights. I'm no stranger to being awake till weird hours of the day. There are no doubts in my mind that I will work just fine on whatever shift I'm on.

What worries me is balance. Everything I'd developed with eating patterns, sleep patterns, work out times has to change. Then there's the matter of balancing weekend life with weekday life. Do I attempt to flip and flop between them? Find middle ground? I have no answers. I can say that the last couple months have had no balance. At least now I'll see my husband everyday and probably get to have dinner with him too on most days. That alone may go further than anything else to help me feel balanced. Its been harder than I expected the last 6 months only seeing him 1-2 days a week.

For tonight this means I've been forcing myself to stay awake. I spent the whole weekend on my typical 1a-10a sleep pattern. 5 a.m. is my goal. I've wanted to sleep for about 4 hours now. This is going to be a very hard couple weeks of adjustment.

Jealousy gets you nowhere

Jealousy.

Its omnipresent. Marketing companies depend on this aspect of our human nature to drive consumption. No one bears immunity to it. It creeps in when you least expect it. 

It happens. Lately that jealousy has been popping up and its been hard to not fall into the "why not me" trap that often follows the visit of the green eyed monster.

So what's to be done? I see too many people play the victim card. They use that card to abuse those they love. They use that card to break the law because they feel they're owed. Overspend in order to keep up with their neighbors or friends. 

Break the cycle. As of late I'm making a conscious effort to do that. I let the thoughts manifest but do not let them take hold. The thoughts creep in and I can feel my face turning to sour grapes, I start to think of the positives in my life. I take stock of what's going right and what's not working. Then I ask myself, "What are you going to do to change the things that aren't going right?" Because in the end, it all comes down to that. Don't like the circumstances? Change your reaction to them. Try something new. And most importantly remember there maybe someone out there having the same jealous thoughts regarding your life.